I used to simply chock it up to I’m just bad at vacationing. I love being warm and outside, but have never been any good at sitting still, so planting my behind on a beach is exactly the opposite of relaxing. It’s torturous.
Slowly though, I’m figuring it out. First, the site visit to Hawaii. In my former line of work as an event planner, it was my job to advance the event. Whether it was marking a route at midnight and unlocking biffies at 4:00 a.m. for a fundraising walk or sampling spas and swimming with the dolphins in Hawaii for an incentive trip – it was my job to do and know everything ahead of an event. While on said site visit, we (my then best-manager-ever, Red) would work half of the day and then meet up with TB and her husband – who had been either golfing or sampling every cocktail on the pool menu – to see the island by helicopter, swim with the dolphins, lounge by the pool, or eat at the expensive restaurants. Fifty-percent work, 50% play. Perfect, except working vacations like that pale quickly in the light of 40 straight 80-hour weeks. No good.
In fact our honeymoon was negotiated to fit a working vacation model – 50% beach, 50% activity. Half the time comprised of sloth, half the time hiking or snorkeling or playing a game – dear god anything but holding down a beach chair.
Fast forward to this week. I think I’ve discovered the perfect vacation for me. Two weeks ago, my boss RC told me to take some time off. Not in the friendly suggestion kind of way, but rather in the I-think-you’re-about-to-have-a-breakdown-so-get-the-hell-out-of-here kind of a way. RC has been great and very empathetic to the situations with my mom and S, but recognized better than I that a human being can only go so long without taking care of herself.
Since TB is unable to travel at present for several reasons and I have an irrational fear of rape and murder associated with solo travel, I planned a 48-hour getaway…precisely six miles from my house. I took a staycation. I detest that phrase as much as coining a couple ‘Bennifer’ but it’s apropos in this case. I booked a room downtown and made a slew of spa appointments. I planned to read and write and do whatever moved me in that moment.
I checked in last night after dinner with my sweetheart. Last night seemed wasted, reading anything and everything alone in my room. The spendthrift in me wondered why I was spending all of this money. But by this morning, after my house made granola parfait and four hours at the spa, I was singing a different tune. In fact, after four hours of massages and facials, I was rethinking my stance on trophy wives.
A delightfully skinny pregnant woman called Brooke did something no other masseuse has yet to accomplish. (Well, aside from the hot stone masseuse in Hawaii, but let’s be honest, it’s Hawaii, half of her job was already done.) Brooke coaxed the thought tornado down to a tradewind. I actually stopped. I don’t know the last time I truly stopped my body, much less my mind. She lulled me into relaxation. If stress were the devil, she would be an exorcist. She’s a stressorcist.
I then meandered
to my old stomping grounds and ate my favorite salad in the daylight of an atrium. I wrote for hours amidst the hustle and bustle of skyway traffic. From there I met one of my besties Rasher for dinner. I see her religiously every week. In fact, Rasher and our other friend M might as well be my church. Anyway, due to circumstances, I hadn’t seen or really talked to her in a month. We talked for three hours straight but in reality could have sat there for eight and not felt caught up. Now, I’m in the hotel lobby (the alone-in-my-room thing didn’t work) drinking my fav wine, writing, and listening to killer music (O.A.R. – listen to the old stuff. The new stuff is a stripped-down commercialized version of genius.)
Tomorrow, I’ll workout, write more in the lobby, go to breakfast if I feel like it, and then learn to take the bus home.
And that’s how I rock the vacation of a stressed-out control freak.