I don’t know what to do. I feel caged by a life of my own making. Would it be better to alone with my kids? What does this relationship bring besides stress? What am I demonstrating to them by how I present myself?
How did I get here?
Why am I again dealing with someone else’s mental illness? Someone else’s victimhood and pity party?
JJG just made CEO and has a $1M lake house. He’s definitely not the answer, but the stark difference between entitled and determined ambition is glaringly obvious.
What choices or signs did I miss?
How did I stray so far off course?
I believed he would be different than other males. He’s not.
He’s cynical and selfish. Immature.
He’s an 18-year-old who wants all the benefits of adulthood and none of the responsibilities. He’s a child playing house. He’s most comfortable being the victim, throwing tantrums, being helpless.
I’m embarrassed to be here.
People don’t change. I know that. People will show you who they are.
He’s showing me who he is what he doesn’t get his way or what he feels he’s owed.
He’s a mediocre white man. He’s a manchild.
If I didn’t consider him live-in childcare right now, I would ask him to leave to give me the physical space I need.
I never envisioned this for myself. Unhappy. Unfulfilled. Alone…again
I don’t know what will turn this ship for me yet. But there has to be more than this.
I’m so tired of this life.
I need to effect change.
People don’t change. People don’t change. When someone shows you who they are — believe them.
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