The tree is trimmed. The wreath is hung. Bing Crosby is on the iPod. The only thing missing is me. I’ve had trouble getting into the holidays since the first Christmas I spent without my family eight years ago.
What I once loved, is now a laborious. It’s a chore to decorate. It’s arduous to celebrate. Sadly, I look most forward to December 26 when every trace of Christmas is stuffed back into the containers from whence it came to be banished to the bowels of the basement for another year.
Ugh.
Perhaps I should try to channel this elusive spirit into another holiday. Thanksgiving would be the obvious choice, but it was again another big family holiday. So that’s out. Independence Day has potential with fireworks and grilling, but the lack of substantial light-up decorations and cards immediately disqualifies it. Easter is out. Perhaps Valentine’s Day? Cookies – check. Cards and decor – check. Meh. It’s not the same. The twinkle lights, the wonderment, the parties, the gifts under the tree…
I think I’m just going to have to figure out a way to make Christmas work. That would be an interesting story: How I Got My Christmas Groove Back. What? Stella did it.
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